Believe

I was about to have my first quarterly test of the year when I had this conversation with E. I was struggling to read and memorize every line in my books and it was far after lights off.

"C'mon Leen,", E said, shifting her position on her bed. "Just go to sleep".

Still keenly looking at my reference book, I replied, " It was easy for you, E. You don't need to study a lot and you still score good grades".

"Do you want to know something?", E asked, after my statement. Now, I turned my back towards her.

"What?"

"I just think that I made it because I simply believed in Allah's work, and whatever He do is the best", E's tone was still playful but it was intense on the other side-me.

E continued.

"I don't even want to enter a boarding school at the first place. Yes, my parents want me to, but I don't even feel like it."

"But then, I didn't know how to carry out our religious obligations. Of course, everybody studied those by the ustaz and ustazahs at school but I just don't get it. I didn't understand why should I do those."

"So I prayed to Allah, and said, ' I don't know what your plan is, but if it could make me a better Muslim, then let me and lead my way'"

"Then, I entered this college. We do play hard here and all, but most of us took our religious obligations seriously. We took our prayers seriously, we took our Quran readings seriously. I learned a lot here, and safe enough to say, I have become a better Muslim, better than I was before."

"Put your outmost faith in Allah, Leen.", she ended her story, "as He is the best planner".

-and I have ended my quest in searching on what did I missed for the past 17 years of my life.