Important

The thing about life is this; it traps and flies you to cloud nine and pushes you off to the hardest ground.

Now, I know how it hurts so bad that no ER department can accept this patient.

Sigh.

I tend to priortize people in my life and I tried my best to make them see and feel that they are important. I would share the most unlaughable joke on Twitter, tell them about my days especially what's happening in college, rant to them about everything that is unpleasant for me, cry to them on the littlest twist, be extra mengada and suddenly can't do anything and asks for their help because I want them to know how much I need them. I truly love them very much.

In return, I just want them to stay beside me on every birthday, graduations, success, heartbreaks, on every journey that I embark on. Even when they're incapable of doing anything, I just want, and beg them to stay. Everytime my forehead touches the praying mat, I only hope for God to bless me on everything that I do because there's nothing compared to what they have done for me and my success is the only joy that I can bring for them, especially the top three.

Today, I learned that how much you make someone so important in your life, you can't ever expect the feeling will be mutual.

I understand that I can't expect them to listen to everything that I say and sometimes I just hit them up at the wrong time and they have their own worries too. I totally bear in mind that the world doesn't revolve around me. I comprehend that I'm not the only person alive in this planet and in fact, I make up only a person out of billions of this world and the spotlight doesn't have to be on me. I am consciously aware that I don't have any special talent like anyone else, but I make the effort to be present in the thunderstorms and rainbows.

Why am I the only one that has to tolerate the doubleticks, offensive sarcastic remarks, no-moods, tantrums and all but can't they as well when it comes to me? Why am I always the bad guy that seems to mess everything up? I am blind if it isn't obvious that I am only useful when in need of use. I don't know which is worse : being blind or blindfolded by all the memories that I have with them.

" Nobody is too busy. If they care, they will make time"

Honestly, I don't know how to walk away, and if I do, where? I am completely lost and at my weakest. God, please forgive and protect me.

The thing is this; no matter how much they hurt me and leave,

-they will always have a space in this small avenue with the size of a fist, my heart ❤️