Better Man

it's funny that
there are tracks that
still reminds me of you,
like this new Little Big Town
record that I'm listening to.

i solemnly swear that i'm not
Pinocchio
and i don't deny that
when i turn the shower tap
around,
i can feel the tip of your fingers
skipping on my skin like hitting
staccatos on the keys of the piano
with every downpour.

i am no superhero but
God keeps giving me flashbacks
that i don't want to remember,
making me a confused physicic.
i would hear your jokes whenever
FaceTime accidentally opens by
itself
but i would also hear your denials
and your lies of every bullet that
you hit
bull's eye,you held me hostage
in your mischief.

and that made me a cruel empress,
not giving you any more arrows.

now and then,
i would still question myself
if you wore suit and tie
opened doors
remembered our anniversary by heart
respected my principles
and looked at me in awe
like Milky Way was in them
sprayed Paco Rabanne like Dad,
my favourite scent
if you were loyal before I left,
if you were a complete
different person,

will we stay awake  in the teenage dream that we sleep for?

'will I be still in love
if you were a better man?'